Your Sweet December
by Kate-Emma
Summary: Complete - PC Leon Taylor hates Christmas. He used to love it, but now he hates it. The story as to why is a long one, but a necessary one to tell...


**Disclaimer: **I don't own PC Taylor… damn, wish I did though! ;)  
Lyrics 'Sweet December' by Short Stack

**A/N: **I promise to stop raining on Christmas soon, just one more Christmas tearjerker coming. But yes, I promise a funny, cheery one soon!

Dedicated to my Nan – Christmas is about being with the ones you love, but when that isn't possible you just have to use the time to miss them.

Your Sweet December

_PC Leon Taylor  
Tragedy/Drama_

Inspired by Jessica Stone's awesome one-shot Never Forget. Go read it!

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PC Leon Taylor hated Christmas. The story as to why is a long one, but a necessary one to tell…

_I'm coming home  
I'm coming_

"Merry Christmas!" Mel and Millie bounded into the Sun Hill Christmas Party dressed in matching green elf outfits. Only Millie had the nerve to wear the ears however. He frowned at them as Mel plonked a Santa hat on his head and Millie thrust a candy cane into his hand. "Oh come on Leon." Mel protested.

"You two look ridiculous." His usually gruff voice matched the look on his face that told them he wasn't as amused by the outfits as he should be.

Millie pouted. "We're Sun Hill's Christmas Elves." She flapped her ears for good measure. "And," she prodded him in the chest with another candy cane, "you're killing the buzz."

"Fine," he muttered, putting on a huge fake grin. "You still look ridiculous."

Millie gave him a small smile as Mel caught the attention of Inspector Smith who seemed to have found himself abused by 'Sun Hill's Christmas Elves' as well and was sporting his own Santa hat. "They look like a traffic fine." Mel giggled and twirled in her green dress. "Yeah, that's not helping PC Ryder."

Mel waved them off and the women walked away, headed towards Mickey Webb who had just noticed he'd been spotted and was edging quickly behind Grace Dasari. Leon pulled the hat off his head and put it and the candy cane down on a nearby table. "Are they attacking everyone?"

"It appears only the male species, which may work fine for now but I'm intrigued to see them try and convince DS Carter to wear a Christmas hat," Smithy replied as the two uniformed officers cast a look to the moody sergeant in the corner sporting a large drink and not much else. "They'll have a better chance with The Grinch." Smithy then gave Leon a look. "You alright?"

Leon nodded. "Fine, just wishing I'd stayed home instead."

Smithy slapped him on the shoulder. "Mate, we all do, but now you're here there's no escape." He went to the drinks' table and picked up a plastic cup of beer. "Here, drown your sorrows."

_So wrap your arms around me darling  
Just so you know I'm coming down_

'Merry Christmas!' The spangled silver banner lined the entrance hall when Leon got home from work. He frowned at it, not feeling very festive at all, but it wasn't his choice so he dealt with it. Anyway, this whole time of year seemed to make her happy. And he didn't mind it all either, especially when she dressed in the 'Santa's Little Helper' suit she now sported, a short red dress with white trim and matching white gloves.

"Well, don't you just look like a traffic fine?" He dumped his keys on the kitchen table and walked over to the bench where she stood stirring something that smelt delicious. "What are you concocting you little witch?"

She giggled, turning to facing him and accepting his kiss. "Something special. You can wait and find out." Wooden spoon in hand, she pushed him away softly. "To the living room, you can wait for your meal."

So Leon took his leave, backing from the kitchen as he did, unable to take his eyes off her. When he got to the lounge he found she'd redecorated the Christmas tree, removing the ornaments he'd requested she use because they were going to waste otherwise. "What happened to the old tree?" He took a seat as he waited for her reply.

"It was tacky. I don't want a tacky Christmas Leon; it's our first Christmas together. Plus, you know Christmas is my favourite time of year." She appeared in the doorway. "I hung Christmas lights too, wanna see?" He followed her out onto the small balcony to find she'd decorated the railing with a snake of festive bulbs, lying silent at the moment.

"Well, aren't you going to turn them on?"

She shook her head, motioning to a black panel she'd duct-taped to the railing as well. "They're solar. See, I'm saving the environment."

Leon rolled his eyes. "Babe, you have 45 minute showers everyday."

She frowned. "Leon, this is England remember? I don't think we're EVER going to run out of water here. It's been raining for the last five days straight and look," she motioned to gathering clouds on the horizon, "I give that bunch another hour or so."

She didn't need to tell him about rain – this week alone he'd endured three days walking the beat in it. "Okay, but as soon as the sun goes down I want to see these lights work."

She giggled and hugged his arm. "They'll be great baby, just you wait."

_Around you darling  
We never looked this beautiful_

"It's your turn to say something," Smithy said, nudging Leon in the arm. It had started as another (awful) Mel idea – everyone give a few lines in place of a speech by the Super. She'd assured them all it would be much merrier than Jack's speeches and when Jack had given a long-winded response to that accusation, the rest of the relief had agreed. Now, it seemed, it was Leon's turn.

He hadn't been paying attention whilst the others talked, just lost in his memories of Christmas banners, trees and lights. How much better things had been then. Not easier, in no way easier, just better. Christmas hadn't felt quite so wasted then. These days he took the Christmas shift, avoided his sister's nagging to join her family for Christmas, ignored his brother's offers to come to Ireland and stay with his family, and politely declined his mother's requests to have dinner with her and his father. Instead he worked. Worked through Christmas Eve, Christmas Day and sometimes even Boxing Day. It was one of the perks of a job that didn't have nine-to-five or recognized public holidays. Last year his Inspector had called him a godsend, but this year the Inspector he had to face was Smithy, and Smithy was much better at reading into things than anyone Leon knew.

So he attempted to tread carefully with his answer, pull out some of that dry wit he knew people liked, and keep his emotions in check.

God he hated Christmas.

"Well, I just want to thank everyone for a great Christmas and to everyone leaving," he smiled at Millie and Will, "just remember that wherever you go you'll never have a Christmas quite like Sun Hill's Christmases and you'll quickly come to miss the freezing cold canteen plastic chairs, the broken heating, CID stealing all of the portable heaters and the obligatory drunk Santa." The others laughed and cheered, raising glasses to Leon as well as the two leaving them before the year was really gone. The others called a 'cheers' as the crowd turned on Smithy to better the toast. Now the attention had gone off him, Leon could slip back away from the crowd under the pretence of getting another drink. Really he needed a break from the crowd and a way to ignore her voice and questions playing over and over in his head.

_Therefore I'll be your sweet December  
I don't need you when I've got my pride_

"It's your turn to say something," she smiled, her voice breaking his trance. He hadn't been listening to her since she'd finished discussing how her brother's plans to come home from America for the holidays had gone horribly wrong. He was entranced by the way her mouth moved when she spoke, the pursing of her lips when she paused to think, the way she touched the tip of her right index finger to them when she was struggling to remember something. Everything about her he loved and he couldn't remember a time when he hadn't. It had been the one constant in his life – loving her. Wanting her. Needing to just hear her voice, smell her perfume and touch her soft skin. She giggled. "You're not even listening to me."

Leon's eyes snapped up to hers. "Of course I am; your brother's still in the States, the lady next-door's daughter is what you termed a B-I-T-C-H." He said it the same way she had, spelling it out. She'd never been one for cursing, funny considering every other mistake she'd made in her life, but it was one of the oddities he found alluring. If she did feel the need to swear she did just that – spelt it out. "And the dog from the lady across the road nearly got hit by a car but you saved it by throwing a tennis ball at it, at which point it turned, caught up in the ball, and returned to the footpath. You should receive an award from the RSPCA."

"Leon Taylor, are you mocking me?" She waved her fork at him, the baked potato stuck on the end of it falling unceremoniously onto her plate. "Because if you are, you're not getting any dessert." She gave an auspicious wink and Leon sat up a little straighter.

"Oh really, so what's for dessert then?"

Her smile grew into a teasing grin. "Christmas pudding and custard." She laughed as the smile fell from his lips. "But you can finish your dinner first." Then, leaning across the small table, she kissed him. It was the sweetest thing he'd had that day and the smile returned. "Now, be good and eat your peas." Sitting back down again she retrieved her lost potato and took a bite out of it with a grin. Leon returned to his meal with a smile as she launched back into the story about a set of Christmas carollers whom she'd warmed with mugs of hot chocolate.

_So can't you see that everything you are belongs to me?_

"Leon Taylor? Is this Leon Taylor?" Leon's eyes snapped up to find Mel and Millie grinning back at him. Millie glanced at Mel, having been the one breaking into Leon's daydreams at the time. "Oh look, he is still alive in there."

"You're hilarious." Leon took another mouthful of beer out of the plastic cup. "What do you want?"

"He's so cheery." Mel grinned, suspiciously hiding something behind her. "You know what, I'm pretty tempted to just not give him anything." She hammed up the hurt expression, leading Millie to just barely smother her smile and adopt an extravagant pout of her own.

"I know. I don't think I'd give him anything. Maybe Ben would like it better."

Leon shook his head. "Fine, I'm sorry girls, what are you giving me?"

Mel pulled out the box with a flourish. "Merry Christmas!" She beamed. "This is from me and Mills." Millie nodded eagerly, watching and waiting for him to open it. Leon did so slowly, pulling out a nice new silver watch. It wasn't overly expensive, but enough, and the gesture was more than anything else.

"Thank you." It was the first genuine thing he'd managed all night, even his well-wishes to Millie and Will less about meaning and more about trying to say something and quickly get the hell out of there before anything more painful began like the girls leading a mass sing-a-long of some Christmas carol. "But I didn't get you anything."

"It's okay." Mel grinned and then, before Leon even knew what was happening, the girls had pulled him into a pose as Ben, armed with a Polaroid camera, snapped their photo. He pulled out the photo and Millie took it, shaking it between two fingers. "Okay, who's next?" Mel asked her.

Millie consulted her list. "The Super." They danced off in the direction of Jack Meadows and Leon was left on his own, new watch in hand, wondering exactly what had just happened.

_The city lights were fading  
I saw her on the pavement_

"Leon Taylor? Is this Leon Taylor?" Leon frowned at the unfamiliar voice on the other end of his mobile phone. "PC Taylor?"

"Yes, it is." He pulled the phone away and looked at the number. "Who is this?"

"My name is Paul, you don't know me but I got this number from one of your cards, in your car glove box. Look, something's happened and I think you should come down here. I called the police too but then I saw your number and thought maybe I should call you, just to be safe."

Leon almost stopped breathing. His cards? His car? What had happened? But the only question he could force out was "where are you?" He was on the next block and Leon left the flat in double time and ran to the site, what lay before him a mess. His own black sedan was crumpled against a telegraph pole, the doors wide open and everything inside thrown to the ground. A large, balding man walked up to him quickly.

"PC Taylor?"

Leon nodded, showing his warrant card without thinking about why. "What happened, did you see?"

Paul cast his eyes to the sky. "It's raining pretty hard. There was an icy patch further up the road. I think she just hit that."

Up ahead an ambulance pulled up and one of the women at the other end of the sight ushered them forward. Following her pointing Leon's eyes came to rest upon the dark figure on the ground, covered by a blanket someone had put over her to cover from the rain and bitterly cold December winds. She was as still as Leon had ever seen her, just laying on the pavement like she'd just laid down there and gone for a nap. But as the ambulance officers leant over her and attached things to her arms and prodded her neck, trying desperately to find a pulse, Leon knew then that she hadn't just laid down and gone to sleep.

She was gone.

_Dressed in black and writing wrongs  
The station played our favourite song _

"Don't worry, I'll be right back." Mel rushed past Leon and from the room, having forgotten to bring in the Christmas log, an over-decorated chocolate cake whose picture Mel had been parading since December 1st. The chocolate cake's picture seemed to be everywhere the days before this party, reminding everyone to come and promoting what an awesome planning job Millie and Mel had done to organise the party. They had even decorated the canteen, the room overflowing with tinsel, baubles and fake snow. The normally blue room had been overtaken by red, green and white.

She returned ten minutes later, sparklers and all, with the log laid out before her. She beamed and placed it on the table where Will couldn't help but steal a sparkler and play with it until it ran out of steam. Leon watched him with a smile before he was torn back to see Jack giving a small speech, despite being denied one earlier and everyone around him looking like they were attending a very boring boardroom meeting.

"… and that's what Christmas is all about – friends, fun and family. So, now, as soon as we're finished here you can all go home to your families and I'll see you all when I get back from my own holiday in Hawaii." He laughed at his own joke as Stevie started doing a strange version of the Hula. Everyone knew the Super would be staying at work over Christmas though – he had for years now so why stop just because he was Superintendent? "So come on then, let's cut this thing up and go on home." The group let out a cheer as Mel and Millie started cutting up the cake, distributing it amongst the crowd. Smithy appeared at Leon's side and handed him a piece.

"Penny for your thoughts," Smithy muttered, not even looking at Leon.

The PC just gave a shrug. "Not much to say Guv; just been a long year and I'll be happy when I can go home tonight and think about starting afresh next year."

"Anything in particular you want to leave in your past?"

Leon gave a soft, sad smile. "Try everything."

_She said, I don't think I remember a taste as sweet as this December and I know…_

"Don't worry, I'll be right back." It had been the last thing she'd said before grabbing his keys off the table and dashing from the house into the night. The rain had just started to come down and Leon had insisted she shouldn't go out in it. But she'd been adamant their dinner would be ruined without the custard. Anyway, she'd said, she was just going down the road. The store on the next block was the only one still open on Christmas Eve – a small corner store run by a pair of brothers who charged twice as much for their products as they were worth. But she just had to have that custard and she'd pay top dollar for it.

He let her go.

Christmas was the one time in her life that always had to be perfect. When everything else in her life was a mess of drug counsellors, debts and old dealers threatening her life, Christmas remained the one clear light at the end of the tunnel.

He let her have her perfect Christmas Eve dinner.

He let her pay top dollar for such a useless item.

Because until next Christmas she'd have more lows than highs, more pain than freedom, and more hurt than comfort.

He walked out onto the balcony to smell the rain, get some air from the stuffy kitchen now twenty degrees hotter thanks to the oven, and found her lights had finally come on, the multi-coloured bulbs blinking furiously. He stood entranced by them for so long, seeing past everything else that he had endured through the year.

She'd be back soon and then everything would be good.

He didn't hear the crash, despite it only being a few streets away. Didn't know what had happened until the call came.

And by then it was too late to change anything.

She'd paid top price for that custard, for her perfect Christmas…

_I'm coming home_

That was why Leon hated Christmas… because the love of his life, his Natalie, had just never come back from that tunnel light…

_To be your sweet December…_


End file.
